I never subscribed to the theory of “haters”. In fact the word was stupid, the people that used it bothered me, and I all-together ignored people that used it. Then life happened and I started to get my share of “haters” (I feel dumb even using that word). They were not blatantly disrespecting me, that takes ethics to do it in front of someone. I noticed it in small doses in people. They see your work and purposely not say a word. They come to your house and see an autographed picture of a celebrity, look at it, and then pretend it never existed. Come on motherf*ckers! Say it! Say, “that’s cool Walid, did you do that?”. I don’t want more than that, just acknowledge it. I worked so many years to do what I love and finally I see things happening. Finally people are hiring me for my talents and they know how many years I struggled, so just say “good job” or say “you’re doing well” or say “that’s cool”. That’s all I want out of people in my life for many years who know my background. This obviously bothers me, because it’s from the people within my circle. But it does not stop there, it is outside the circle also.
People find out I shot a particular persona, and they follow with a “were they like a friend of yours, is that how you got them?”. I’ve even heard, “did you have to sleep with the manager to shoot _________ (name left out on purpose). And I wanted to say, “I have talent you piece of shit and I don’t sleep with people to get a job” but I didn’t. I did not because I started to realize most humans fall into 3 groups.
Group 1: Those that have big dreams, no matter what the job is. Those that as a kid wanted to be a teacher, an actor, a writer, anything. They wanted nothing more and they worked really hard for it. They may or may not make it, but they will never say “I did not try”.
Group 2: They are the ones that can still be teachers, actors, doctors or they can be blue collar workers. Group 2 never had huge professional dreams. They wanted stability, they want to have their 2.5 kids, white picket fence, and be happy with the one they love. There is nothing wrong with this group, they just never had a burning passion to be something. They found their jobs because they heard it was a fun job, or their parents were always doctors, or they found the outlook of that profession to be positive.
Group 3: This is the group to be most afraid of. They HAD and still have the same burning desires as group one. They so so badly wanted to be something or do something with their lives, but fear stopped them. The fear of failing or the fear of success and change made them accept any job. While group 2 can be happy with most jobs, group 3 cannot because everyday they have a regret. So when friends of group 3 fall into group 1 and things start to happen, group 3 people begin to resent. They begin to cast a shadow on people’s success. They begin to discredit or discount the accomplishments. They are the ones that bring you down after you share your big goal with them. They are the ones that find the worst in a situation and feed doubt. They are the ones that cannot find happiness for you, because they never began searching for it themselves. THEY are the haters we spoke of earlier.
I think it’s important to know that, because one should know the resentment is not geared towards YOU or ME, as much as it is towards themselves for the doubt, the fear, and the lack of self-belief. This helps me forgive people who speak badly about me or rain on my parade, but it also starts to pull me away from them.